Home Sweet Home

after dinner I wash the dishes because..
once you asked a lover if he knew what it meant to wash dishes
and he laughed in your face as he held my hand 
but I remember thinking it odd the way you said
what it meant rather than how to.. 
scrub the resentment clean in warm water
when he stacks the plates neatly in front of me
and so I do it after dinner to feel the goosebumps 
travel up my arms as I ponder your choice of 
what it meant rather than how to..
scrape frustration into the compost 
when yet again he leaves the table in disarray 
so I do it after dinner to save my breath 
and wonder at your choice of 
what it meant rather than how to..
watch tenderness swirl sickly down the drain
as once again I was the dishes after dinner
and contemplate how to fight nausea 
when his hand no longer touches mine
and what it means when he walks resolutely 
away from the kitchen sink 

where I wash dishes after dinner